Panic on the Highway 山路歷險記 （4）

[16] My brother's truck, moving downhill fast, got far ahead of me. With it went the last vestiges of my courage. On one side of my little car the mountain rose like a gigantic wall of sheer rock. On the other side was thin air. I struggled desperately not to look over the edge.

[17] Traffic was streaming down the grade, mostly big trucks in the righthand lane. I wanted to join them there but I could not bring myself to steer to the right, toward the edge. Instead I kept inching to the left, going slower and slower in the passing lane, trying to hug the mountain wall.

Drivers behind me honked their horns angrily. Panic paralyzed me. I wanted to stop but there was no place to pull over. I tried to say the Lord's Prayer. My throat was too tight for words to come.

[18] Ahead of me I could see that the road made a sweeping turn to the left. A river of steel was rushing around that curve, moving fast under the pull of gravity. I knew that all I had to do was inch the steering wheel to the left and keep pace with traffic, but my arms were rigid. The fear that filled the car was stronger, much stronger, than I was.

[19] Behind me the impatient horns blared their angry chorus. I was absolutely certain that I was going to plunge straight ahead, through the flimsy barrier, then down, down, down through an endless drop. I moaned through clenched teeth. Again I tried to pray, this time silently. I begged God not to fail me, to take full control of the situation. Lord, save me from my fear.

[20] Then, abruptly, something unbelievable happened. The traffic roared on. The curve was coming closer. But suddenly, in a flash, the fear vanished. I experienced a presence, virtually a palpable sensation, of overwhelming love filling my car, washing over me, blotting our the stark panic. Another phrase from the Bible flashed into my mind; "Perfect love casteth out fear." I felt that perfect love, the Lord's love, reaching out to touch my shoulder. A voice, soundless yet perfectly real, said, You are safe now. I am here.

[17]下坡的路上車流如潮，大卡車大都行駛在右車道上。我想加入到他們中間，可自己就是不聽使喚，不但不能開向靠崖一側的右邊，反而不停地向左邊峭壁上擠。車在通道上越走越慢，車身快要貼住峭壁了。我身后的司機們憤怒地按起了喇叭。驚恐完全懾服了我，使我幾乎麻痹。我想要停車又沒有地方靠邊。我試圖背誦主禱文，但喉嚨發緊，說不出話來。

[18]我看見前方有個角度很小的左轉彎，在地心引力的作用下，車流急速繞過彎處。我心里明白，我必須盡力行駛在左側并與其他車輛保持同速，可我雙臂僵硬。車里恐懼氣氛迷漫，使我倍感自己弱小不堪。

[19]我身后不耐煩的喇叭聲響成了一片。我絕望地感到自己就要向前直沖出那不堪一擊的護欄，然后下墜，再下墜，墜入萬丈深淵。悲鳴從咬緊的牙縫中擠出。我又一次試圖祈禱，這次是默默的。我懇求上帝不要令我失望，千萬控制住局面。上帝，救我于驚恐之中吧!

[20]驀地，令人難以置信的情形出現了。車輛仍舊叫著。轉彎處越來越近。然而驚慌失措的情緒瞬間全然不見了。我分明感到神靈的降臨，一種清晰而巨大的愛的力量直撲車里，朝我涌來，頓時將懼伯一掃而光。另一句《圣經》中的名言閃過我心頭：“偉大的愛使人無畏�！蔽腋杏X到了這種偉大的愛，來自上帝的愛，它從天而降。一個無聲而又十分真切的聲音說到：現在你安全了。我就在你身邊。